if you're reading this regularly, or know me well at all, you know that i just pretty much tell it like it is. and in "telling it like it is", i am often very tongue in cheek. (admittedly, probably, going a little overboard at times.) i love you all dearly- yes, even you stranger from australia who's face i've never seen. but especially my dear friends and family... we know that your prayers have made all the difference to wren's recovery, and your kind words have been received with nothing but their intended purpose- our comfort. if you're reading this, you care enough to follow, then you've already comforted us more than you know. (thadd can't believe how many people read...)
i wrote the post "what not to say" for all the reasons i listed previously, but want to reiterate them just so we're on the same page. i compiled these from other parents. they bore their hearts to help me make this post. it's not about what has been already said, but a new approach in the future.
i get approximately 100 hits to this page in a day (30% are new), that means a lot of people are looking for information, either for themselves or for loved ones. i have that nifty feedjit tracker over to the right that shows me what people are googling to bring them here. on the message boards there are posts all the time "my brother is having a preemie, what should i say/do/get them?".i wrote this post to better let everyone who is charting new territory know at least what sort of map they're making. before we lost 2 babies early, and max late term, i didn't have a clue what to say to women who had a miscarriage. and the same goes for a preemie- the thought never crossed my mind! what an emotional rollercoaster it is... what great risks to the baby... what would i say? i have no idea! but, again, if you know me, you know i would have googled it. and hopefully found a blog like this, where someone who's been through it could share the experience and the advice.
and this preemie momma's advice is still the same: offer them an ear and a hug. they've been through a lot.