actual or adjusted?

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for those of you who don't know, there are two ways of aging a preemie. there's the actual age, which is, well, the chronological age from the birthdate. and the adjusted age, in which the age is determined from the expected due date. for instance, wren's actual age is 3 months and a few weeks... her adjusted age is about 3 weeks or so.
this of course, presents a problem for parents. what do i go by? what should i expect? all of our doctors have said to go by the adjusted age. i think this is to keep us from getting discouraged. after all, it really could take longer for her to catch up... she did so much womb growing out here in this terrible CPAP and IV world.
for wren, we're just trying to keep her challenged and at least caught up to her adjusted age. with preemies it's ever so important to keep them stimulated... they can do so much more if you constantly